Relationship Counselling & Coaching in Lincoln & Online
Relationships can be a source of deep joy – and also of real stress, hurt and confusion. As a relationship therapist based in Lincoln, I offer counselling and coaching for individuals, couples, teenagers and families, both in-person and online across the UK. Together we’ll explore what’s happening in your relationships, improve communication, and develop practical tools so you can feel calmer, more connected and more confident in yourself.
How Relationship Therapy Can Help You
Improve Your Emotional Wellbeing
When relationships feel difficult, it can affect every part of life – sleep, work, parenting, even your sense of who you are. Relationship counselling gives you a space to slow down, notice your feelings and understand where they’re coming from.
We’ll work together to:
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Reduce anxiety, stress and overthinking around your relationships
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Make sense of strong emotions such as anger, jealousy or shame
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Build self-compassion so you’re kinder to yourself, not just others
Build Better Coping Strategies
Many people come to therapy because they feel stuck in unhelpful patterns – shutting down, avoiding difficult conversations or reacting in ways they later regret. In our sessions, we’ll identify your current coping strategies and gently replace the ones that no longer serve you.
You’ll learn:
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How to stay grounded during conflict
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Ways to soothe overwhelm and emotional triggers
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Practical tools for managing stress at home, work and in family life
Create Healthier, More Connected Relationships
Whether you’re in a long-term partnership, dating, co-parenting or navigating complex family dynamics, therapy can help you relate in a healthier way. We’ll look at how you communicate, set boundaries and express your needs – and where things are getting tangled.
Together we can:
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Improve communication so you both feel heard
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Break cycles of recurring arguments and misunderstanding
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Rebuild trust after hurt, distance or betrayal
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Strengthen connection, closeness and teamwork
Support Your Personal Growth
Relationship therapy isn’t just about “fixing” problems – it’s also about understanding yourself more deeply. As we explore your patterns in relationships, you’ll gain insight into your values, needs and boundaries.
This can support you to:
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Develop a stronger sense of self-worth
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Make clearer choices about the relationships you want in your life
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Let go of old stories that are holding you back
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Move forward feeling more confident and authentic
My Approach to Councilling
Who I Work With
Couples Counselling in Lincoln & Online
Couples counselling offers a confidential space for you and your partner to talk honestly about what’s going on – without blame or judgement. You might be facing constant arguments, feeling more like flatmates than partners, rebuilding after an affair, or wondering whether to stay together.
I help couples:
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Understand what sits underneath recurring conflict
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Communicate more clearly and listen without defensiveness
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Rebuild trust, safety and intimacy
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Decide together what a healthy way forward looks like
Individual Relationship Therapy
You don’t have to be in a couple to work on your relationships. Many clients come alone to explore patterns that repeat in dating, friendships, family life or previous relationships.
Individual relationship therapy can help if you:
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Feel anxious, clingy or very distant in relationships
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Struggle with jealousy, fear of abandonment or fear of commitment
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Keep choosing partners who aren’t good for you
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Are healing after a breakup, divorce or difficult family experience
Teen & Family Relationship Support
As an experienced therapist in both school settings and private practice, I have a particular interest in supporting teenagers and families. When communication breaks down at home, it can leave everyone feeling stuck, worried and exhausted.
Family-focused therapy can:
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Improve communication between parents, carers and teenagers
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Support blended and separated families to navigate change
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Help young people express emotions safely and feel understood
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Rebuild trust and connection after conflict, trauma or upheaval
Common Relationship Issues I Help With
Communication breakdown & conflict
“We keep having the same argument” • frequent misunderstandings • walking on eggshells.
Trust, betrayal & affairs
Emotional or physical affairs • secrecy or lies • rebuilding after broken trust.
Jealousy, insecurity & anxiety in relationships
Fear of being left, cheated on or replaced • comparing yourself to others • overthinking.
Intimacy & emotional distance
Feeling more like flatmates than partners • reduced affection or closeness • difficulty being vulnerable.
Life transitions & family changes
Moving in together, becoming parents, blended families, children leaving home, illness, redundancy, bereavement.
Separation, divorce & co-parenting
Deciding whether to stay or leave • separating with as much respect as possible • supporting children during and after a separation.
If your situation isn’t listed here, you’re still welcome to get in touch. We can talk about whether relationship counselling or coaching would be a good fit for you.
My Approach to Counselling & Coaching
Integrative, Relational & Trauma-Informed
I use an integrative approach, drawing on different therapeutic models so that our work fits you as an individual or couple. I pay close attention to the relationship we build in the room – how safe, heard and understood you feel – because this is often where change begins.
My training includes work with trauma, sexual violence, domestic abuse, grief, LGBTQIA+ issues and rewind therapy, and I’m committed to providing an inclusive, non-judgemental space for all clients.
Practical Tools You Can Use in Everyday Life
Alongside deeper exploration, I also incorporate coaching techniques and practical tools. That might mean learning new communication skills, experimenting with different ways of responding in conflict, practising grounding strategies, or setting clear, kind boundaries.
The aim is for you to leave each session with insight and something tangible you can try between sessions.
A Safe, Confidential & Compassionate Space
Many people worry about being judged, blamed or told what to do. In our work together, my role isn’t to take sides or decide who is “right” or “wrong”, but to help you understand what’s happening and find a way forward that feels honest, respectful and sustainable.
What my clients say
"I can't thank Jess enough for the support she's provided me. From our very first session, I felt completely at ease. Jess has a way of truly listening and understanding, which helped me work through my anxiety and gain confidence in myself."
Alexa J
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In-Person in Lincoln & Online Across the UK
I offer in-person sessions in Lincoln, as well as secure online video sessions for individuals, couples and families across the UK. Online therapy can be particularly helpful if you have caring responsibilities, busy work schedules or live outside the area but would like to work with me.
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Session length: 50–60 minutes (individuals); 90 minutes (couples and families)
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Fees: £60 individual / £90 couples / £120 family session (see Services page for full details)
Ready to Take the Next Step?
You don’t have to have the “right words” or a clear plan before reaching out – simply noticing that something needs to change is enough.
If you’d like to explore whether relationship counselling or coaching could help, you can:
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Use the contact form below to send me a brief message
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Email me at jesscathoy@hotmail.co.uk
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Connect with me on Facebook
I’ll get back to you as soon as possible so we can discuss what you’re looking for and whether I’m the right person to support you.
